Sunday, October 9, 2016

இழப்பு

நா ன் வளர்ந்த நாட்களில் எனது பாட்டன் பாட்டியோடு பழகிய காலம் மிக குறைவு என்று வருந்தியதுன்டு. என் தந்தையின் தகப்பனாரை நான் புகைப்படத்தில் மட்டுமே கண்டுள்ளேன். என் பாட்டி ஞானபூமி வார இதழ் மூலம் எனக்குள் ஆன்மீகத்தை விதைத்தார்,
இதை உணர்ந்திட எனக்கு இத்தனை வருடங்கள் ஆயிற்று.

இன்று வளரும் சிறுவர் சிறுமியர் தாய் தந்தையோடு பழகும் குறுகிய நேரம்  குறித்து பின்னாளில் நிச்சயம் வருந்துவர். பாட்டன் பாட்டி பற்றி சொல்ல அவசியமே இல்லை

இது வெறும் வருத்தம் மட்டுமல்ல, மாபெரும் தலைமுறை இழப்பு

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உளறல்

Working women debate

This article has a better theme to debate.

http://www.thenewsminute.com/article/sc-says-its-cruel-separate-husbands-and-parents-are-parents-best-cared-sons-51089


Note: Am not talking about everyone, certain things apply to certain ppl. This post does not apply to all men and women

Those who ask "what about the girl's parents?"
Who and what stops the girl to give care to her parents? If she could get to a point of divorce just to stay away from his parents, it shouldn't be difficult. Am serious about it, women should indeed think about it, how many are ready? These days women do earn and when the parents don't have a son, this becomes a must.

"Why did he marry if he wants to live with his parents?"
This is so often asked, dint the girl knew this before marriage that she will have to live with in-laws?  Many cases are there where marriage talks do stop when girl's family place their expectation to keep no in-laws at home.
When elderly care is so pathetic already, while most parents have spent everything on their kids including their PFs, without any social security infrastructure for elders by govt, this is the best way to multiply our social chaos.

"Why wouldn't you just hire a maid to care the parents?"
I have employed 3 maids at my home of 870sqft(20% is common area tho) 2 bhk, 1 for cleaning, 2 for cooking, 3 for baby care and you think it's so easy? I had to  place a security camera after a few months. Anyways let's say I somehow manage everything with all maids, lets say 10 maids, what is the purpose of a girl to be force locked with a male? The only thing left is s.. am sure you wouldn't like me equating that to marriage or would you?

From the article "did the guy first spend time with his parents in the first place?"
If he isn't , why would he ask for divorce with wife ? to get separated from parents?
So , a male should earn, should earn more than the wife if not double , spend everything from his pocket for the family , spend his time for all the house hold chores like shopping, kids time, parents time , take the wife out every weekend, every weekend it should be a new place, it should neither be boring nor be tiring, all this and yes make sure the wife's office commute is the most comfortable, last but not the least don't dare question about the money earned by the wife.

 You will get into a family but will not have a good relationship with members (that's not even accepted at workplace) and you question back the guy's relationship with his parents with whom he had already spent close to 30 years or more. And any task at home will make you a maid? They say having a maid is Western? Really ? Getting to a maid is the last thing anyone does at west, its so damn costly!

Yes, there are instances of elders being abused, but there are also instances where elders so piss off their children.

Problem I see is that, everyone at home with some money on hand monthly, be it elders or son/ daughter or in-laws, wants to create an atmosphere at home that they individually want rather than what's actually the collective need of the family. When you have chosen to live together, what's the point in trying to create an isolated world of your own forcing others to get in?

These days, men who does tasks at home are proud of doing it, but women , working class women, may be not all, think they are forced into a maid. I see where this is coming from, yes women were abused in the past forcing them at home, but why would you take revenge on today's good men for that? Isn't this very similar to the cast reservation debate?

Note again: Am not talking about everyone, certain things apply to certain ppl. This post does not apply to all men and women